Grumiaux’s Weblog

Saturday night, October 27, 2007, my friend and I were standing on her balcony in Manhattan about 7:00 pm smoking.   She pointed to the sky and said “What the hell is that?”, and I said “What?”  I turned and looked up, there were several spheres, silver and round coming in our direction.  They spread out in a “V” formation and very quickly flew over the apartment.  There was no sound, and they were flying at a high rate of speed, just barely over tops of the buildings in a Northeast direction.

We looked at each and other, and she said “That did NOT just happen”..and we continued with a similar conversation of OMG’s  and WTF’s? for the next half hour.

The only explanation I can sanely accept is that they were perhaps balloons from a nearby “Wicked” festival that was taking place the next day, and they were setting up the night before?  Except..they were all silver and flew in formation instead of floating straight up.

Whatever..pass the Dallas BBQ margarita.

So, I moved to New York City about 5 months ago, fresh off the plane from the Deep South.  Upon landing I promptly vomited repeatedly, pee’d my pants in the cab and passed out momentarily…and all this time I thought I had nerves of steel.   Moving to New York was a last minute decision, I received an invitation from a friend at about noon on a Saturday, and by 2:00 that afternoon was boarding a plane.  Some may call me crazy, but it felt right.  The timing was perfect, I was living on unemployment due to corporate cutbacks and hurricane damage, and I need a change, a fresh start.   New York beckoned.   

Now, I’ve seen all the movies and heard all the torrid stories about the naked city, but five months later, I have to tell you, New York is a lot nicer place than I ever imagined.  The people here have been surprisingly polite, considerate and completely innocuous (disclaimer:  this does not include the mentally ill). 

For the most part, I feel perfectly safe out at night, and I don’t feel like I’m bound to get mugged in Central Park.   Central Park is actually one of my favorite places here, it’s very large, beautiful, and seems like a haven amongst all the joggers, bike riders, and nannies with strollers.  Of course, there’s always the random celebrities, and I’m always spying one or two..or imagining they are.  Why just the other day Al Pacino passed by while I was waiting on a bench for my friend.  I’ve never seen him in jeans, it seemed strange.  Moments later, Anthony Hopkins walked by in a hurry..he must have been meeting up with Al.   My friend told me he didn’t look like Anthony Hopkins…but of course it was..(shut up friend). 

There were two celebrities that I know I encountered for real..Tim Gunn, from “Project Runway” was down in Hell’s Kitchen one evening, and one of John Gotti’s Grandson’s was riding the subway with me.  Now I know I’m just a southern hick, but I am aware that you don’t stare at people on the subway, especially not a member of the family.  I gave a myself a pat on the back for watching enough reality tv to know who these people were. 

There are certain things that really did surprise me though: 

·          Cigarettes are around $7 a pack for my brand

·          Random people will stop you at least once a day and ask you for a cigarette.

·          There are extremely talented performers on the subway platforms.

·          Some of the best comedy writers are homeless.  In Union Square, one holds up a cardboard sign that says “Please help; I need two women to take me home and ravage me.”

·          Life without a car is not only possible, but preferred.

·          There is great food, everywhere.

·          My favorite meal, “The Depression Special” two hotdogs and a soda for $2.50 Papaya hotdogs franchise.

·          There is a street festival every weekend, it changes locations and names, but it’s the same festival selling gyros, purses, scarves, sunglasses, watermelon chunks in cups, lemonade and reggae cds.  If the festival is more than a block long, then repeat the list of vendors.

·          Some of the news papers here are a bit…”tabloidish”.  A teenager showing his friends his gun on the streets translates in print to “a gun-wielding maniac”.  A burglar dressed in all black will always get front page as “the Ninja burglar”.  People get “pinched” and “nabbed” and whatever the Yankee’s do, it’s big news.

·          There are jobs galore here, and with my resume, I can earn anywhere from $30K to $80K.   I don’t know why.

·          You won’t find a Walmart here.

·          There is a bodega (mom and pop store) about every 20 feet.

·          There is a store and district for everything…buttons..zippers..

·          Pressure washing sidewalks seems to be a foreign concept.

·          Drag Queen Bingo is a must every Friday night.

·          One Dallas BBQ margarita will put me under the table. 

More adventures in the big city to come boys and girls..perhaps I’ll also be brave enough to share a bizarre UFO sighting my friend and I had this week in the skies over Manhattan.